Sometimes big people just aren't nice...

From a Three Year Old’s Perspective

Theology in the Trenches

by Kathleen Kjolhaug

“It’s not nice for big people to not give stuff to little people when they ask for it.”

“What?” was the only thing I could muster in response to the three-year-old who had been perched beside me in a car seat for the past six hours.

For meltdown purposes, I had purchased several toy ponies. Each was a different color with long multicolored manes to match. They were sure to come in handy at some point along the journey.

About three quarters through our nine-hour trip, I decided to pull one out. The three-year-old was thrilled. She was engaged and quite content. She was content that is, until she caught sight of the others which were not in her possession. Suddenly, the one she’d chosen didn’t quite satisfy.

Brilliant negotiator that she is, she decided to choose one to give to her sister, and since her sister wasn’t exactly along for the ride, she offered to be so kind as to hold it for her.

“Yes! The blue one!” she screeched and reached for it as grandma’s boundaries all but melted. I passed it back so the pink one she’d been playing with would have a buddy. What else are grandma’s for?

It wasn’t long before her little voice piped up once again as she made mention that perhaps she would like to hold yet a third toy pony. When I gently but firmly suggested that two were enough, her viewpoint was spot on…from the perspective of a three-year-old. And that’s when her inner thoughts gave voice to the words mentioned above.

“It’s not nice for big people to not give stuff to little people when they ask for it.”

What ensued, I do not fully recall. I only know that three-year-olds, as delightful as they are, are not in charge. Their perspective is worthy of note, but so too is the wisdom of the adults in their lives because after all, we are the big people. As nice as big people are…or not…they are always nicest when helping little people gain perspective.

What I do recall is that by the end of the nine-hour journey, we had a happy three-year-old swinging several (yes more than two) little ponies playfully in the backseat. And, we had happy big people because when you are in the car with a three-year-old for nine hours…that too offers perspective.

Isaiah 55:8 breathes new insight for all ages and stages, “For My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways My ways, declares the Lord.” I simply trust His perspective. Amen.